Restless

I am restless
into the falling leaves
gold feeling
slight and chest painful
don't know where to go
what to want
only missing ... something
Cat's in the duck food, I just watch
little golden barrels fly across the greeness of the carpet
just out of reach
the air, the atmosphere is gold too
spreading light
trapped
to the leaves
where it glows.

In sandy silence

Can I wait to get on in my life
I can wait
take the time to smell the shampoo in the childs hair
to talk about angst with the teen who is still that toddler
and find a way to communicate with a green-eyed monster.
Can I wait
This is not waiting
this is life
But still should not be ridden like a wave going crashing
but pushed, as the wind pushes the wave
into the rocks
pushing rocks into sand
and sand into dust
Act
for
the next step
is only yours.

The step is green
growing into the future
weaving the child that was you into the adult that is your child.
The step is there
don't waiver it, grow it.